Some men have a problem stemming from premature ejaculation. In fact, it’s one of the most common sexual issues out there. These guys would give anything on earth to last longer. What happens, however, when you go to the other end of the spectrum?
While some are struggling with premature ejaculation, other guys can’t come even after prolonged stimulation and intercourse. The condition is called delayed ejaculation and it can be as troubling as PE (and even more so!).
What Is Delayed Ejaculation?
Delayed or impaired ejaculation is a condition in which a man needs very long periods of sexual activity to climax. In the most severe cases, a man would be incapable of ejaculating altogether.
For some men, delayed ejaculation is a temporary problem that will occur under specific circumstances. In this instance, the condition is similar to PE. Delayed ejaculation could also be a lifelong medical condition.
Delayed ejaculation from time to time is considered normal. It becomes a medical issue when it continues for a very long period of time or if it leads to the loss of sexual satisfaction for one or both partners.
Causes Of Delayed Ejaculation
There are several medicinal causes, as well as a couple of additional risk factors that can be blamed for delayed ejaculation. Some of the most common physical and psychological issues that contribute to the condition include:
- Pelvic nerve injury making orgasms impossible (even through masturbation)
- Urinary tract infections
- Diabetic neuropathy
- Hormone-related conditions like hypogonadism (low testosterone) and hypothyroidism
- Depression and anxiety
- Poor body image or viewing sex as a taboo
- Difference between sexual expectations (like fantasies or the depiction of sex in adult movies) and the actual experience with a partner
- Relationship problems and sexual incompatibility/performance anxiety
As you can see, several of the causes of delayed ejaculation are the same ones that cause PE. This is particularly true for the psychological factors that affect sexual performance. The manner in which the body is going to react to such triggers, however, is strictly individual.
Apart from being caused by certain physiological and psychological conditions, delayed ejaculation may also be attributed to an array of risk factors.
Here are the most prominent ones:
- The use of medications like antidepressants, high blood pressure medications, diuretics and anti-seizure medications
- Alcohol abuse
- Dependence on porn and masturbation (in which cases men can ejaculate but they find it impossible to orgasm with a partner)
- Having undergone prostate surgery
How To Deal With Delayed Ejaculation
While some guys may think that lasting hours in bed is a dream come true, delayed ejaculation sufferers know just how disappointing such a condition can be.
Men who suffer from delayed ejaculation are aroused and they find sex pleasurable. Unfortunately, such men don’t benefit from the release than an orgasm provides. In addition, they can experience problems when trying to get a partner pregnant.
Finding a solution for delayed ejaculation is a very important task, even if you feel shy or embarrassed about it. The good news is that you have a number of options to try:
- Sexual therapy
a therapist can identify the cause of delayed ejaculation (if it’s not a medicinal one). Once the factor that makes it difficult for men to orgasm has been identified, a sexual therapist will recommend relaxation therapeutic techniques that will decrease the performance anxiety in guys. A sex therapist may also recommend going off masturbation for a certain period of time in an attempt to make intercourse with a partner more satisfying.
- Focus on exploring each other’s sexuality
if you’re a man who can ejaculate through masturbation but not with a partner, chances are that the condition is psychological rather than caused by a medical condition. Building intimacy and trusting each other is very important for overcoming the problem. You can start by attempting to masturbate with your partner in the room. The next step would be mutual masturbation, intense foreplay and intercourse. Each step should move you to closer to experiencing an orgasm during sex.
- Switching meds
if your delayed ejaculation is caused by a medicine you’re currently taking, ask your doctor to switch the medicine up. Chances are that you’ll notice an improvement almost immediately.
while this therapy is denounced by many urologists, some guys have found it to be beneficial. In essence, hypnotherapy can be used to address subconscious anxieties and help a guy relax during sex. Some men find it to be excellent for overcoming performance anxiety. You don’t have anything to lose and if other therapeutic approaches have failed, hypnotherapy may be a possibility to try.
- Address relationship problems: unresolved relationship issues and anger towards a partner could be powerful subconscious factors that will be ruining one’s sex life. It’s important to have an honest discussion with each other and discover any hidden resentment.
- Is a possible pregnancy freaking you out
in some cases, delayed ejaculation can be “unlocked” when a couple starts trying for a baby. In such instances, it’s possible that the fear of getting a woman pregnant is fueling the condition. Are you ready to be a father? Ask yourself this question if you’ve started experiencing delayed ejaculation once you started baby-making. If the answer is “no,” it may be time to have an honest discussion with your significant other.
In essence, delayed ejaculation can be much more difficult to treat than PE but don’t lose hope. Get your health checked first. While it’s unlikely, your delayed ejaculation could be caused by a medical condition.
The most important thing is to keep on trying and to build a strong bond with your partner. If both of you aren’t onboard with finding a solution, delayed ejaculation could cause relationship problems, breakups and even depression in guys.
Talk to your partner about it instead of isolating her. Turn finding the solution a common mission for both of you. Dealing with such problems can make your relationship stronger.
Be honest and keep on trying. While it is a challenging issue, delayed ejaculation can be overcome with a bit of assistance.